Thursday, October 31, 2013

Happy Halloween!

Happy Halloween to the best readers in the world! Bwa ha ha!
- my evil witchy laugh

And let's not forget to annoy your neighbors like this >>>
No mask needed!

Annoy them too much & you could end up here >>>

Alternatively, your neighbors just might fall in love with you & you'd end up here >>>

Or, have your dogs do your dirty work for you. Hey, it's one way to deal with evil neighbors >>>

Finally, scare your kids with these troubling tales from your past >>>

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

I've reached that age

I am old. As well as falling apart. 
I looked in the mirror this morning & realized that I am losing the collagen in my cheeks! Time to start the retinols again. So, I had a huge laugh when I saw this baby right here...
I Panic
True that. True that.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Kandee Johnson's Halloween Playlist

Do you need costume makeup help? 
Have no fear. Kandee is here!


Tatum Tuesday, Halloween Style

This Halloween...
Make your own keep calms here.
I <3 guys who sparkle
Channing Tatum in Entertainment Weekly
Photo by Gavin Bond via UnwrappedPhotos
Okay now. Obviously I love the movie Twilight & have zero problems with anyone associated with this movie. Typically I'll watch it & then become all "woe is me" because this type of love is just so unrealistic. Man lovers, please stop comparing your men to Edward. I mean, continue glittering yourself up by all means. But Bella's mom is soooo right when she says their love is just so intense. Could you even imagine in real life Edward speeding up to you in a car so fast, like all the time, stalker style? This relationship would also have to endure some really boring dinner dates. What do you mean you're not going to friggin' eat? Are you calling me fat as I order & eat this salad since you're eyeing me down like a hawk? Honestly, I want a steak. That's it. I'm becoming anorexic since you're also probably counting my chews since you're not friggin' eating. Sorry to go off on tangents, but I've got bacon & steak on the brain. Did I mention I'm going as a carnivore for Halloween?! No costume needed. Just the entire supply of McDonald's drive thru bacon for 99 cents. Who else thinks this clever drive thru idea is ahhh-mazing? It's the best idea since the invention of the wheel. But that's neither here nor there. Back on point. I've honestly seen the movie Twilight hundreds of times, yet have never once noticed any of this due to R Patz totes gorgey-ness:

Lols! Now, in honor of #TatumTuesday, take a gander in this below direction. Enjoy! And just for the record, CT is the king of all twerkers. Word. Sham wow. And awesome sauce.

Monday, October 28, 2013

Motivational Mondays

Need more Monday motivation with 
your pumpkin spice latte?

Oprah has a free dream / visualization board you can make online. It's fairly addictive, so beware when clicking here. You can not only add your favorite pics, but also browse through pics. You can even add text, like bullet points or quotes. Make one for your business plans, vacation plans, dream bedroom, life goals or whatever else you can possibly dream up. Then when done, let's start trying to make these dreams of yours a reality.

Rock on.

Happy Birthday, Edith Head!

For those of you who looked at this morning, you shall see Google Doodle celebrating the seriously iconic costume designer's birth! If she were still with us, she would be 116 years young today. Any who, did you know the character Edna Mode from Disney The Incredibles movie was modeled from her likeness? How cool is that, dahhling?!

Any who, Ms. Head won over eight Academy Awards. That's more than any other woman, Wikipedia quotes.

So, it only makes sense that her client list includes: 

Grace Kelly, Audrey Hepburn, Ginger Rogers, Sophia Loren, Elizabeth Taylor, Bette Davis, Shirley MacLaine, Barabara Stanwyck, Natalie Wood & Anne Baxter. 

How amazing would it of been to met and personally designed these actresses?!

Below are some of my favorite Edith quotes: 

What a costume designer does is a cross between magic and camouflage. We create the illusion of changing the actors into what they are not. We ask the public to believe that every time they see a performer on the screen he's become a different person.

I'm going to take it home and design a dress for it.  
- on winning her fifth Oscar in 1954

You can lead a horse to water and you can even make it drink, but you can't make actresses wear what they don't want to wear.

I have yet to see one completely unspoiled star, except for Lassie.

Enjoy your day, loves. 
Be inspired, without capes on, of course!

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Limited Edition Makeup News

Cinematic Lipstick by NARS in "Full Frontal"- $26
Get it here.

Ooh, do I need this color for the holidays! 

Get your holiday glam on with NARS Guy Bourdin Holiday Collection limited edition loveliness.

There are five to-die-for shades for Holiday 2013. Snag them up ASAP.

Furthermore, watch some NARS exclusive 
makeup tutorials here.  Inspiration awaits!

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Halloween Sales To Know About

Howl-O-Scream at Busch Gardens has a coupon code for $39 off by using code "Facebook2013" when purchasing tickets online.

Click here for $39 off!

Go on, my dearies. You know you want to secretly walk into that eery room through the above door, even though from what I can tell is currently on fire...

Bwa ha ha!
(- my witchy laugh)

Click here to get your discount on.
TimeToSpa is also having a specially spooktacular 25% off discount. Score! Virtual spa goodies, that is.

Violent Eyes in "Union Jack", 4 pk, $9.99
Get it here.

Austin Powers is also in the hiz-ouse. He's telling you to get only the best eye and lip tattoos in the world. He's also begging you to get the Union Jack design. Yeah, baby, yeah! When wearing these to parties be sure to talk like Ms. Britney Spears, Governor. What?! It's catchy...

Violent Lips "The Leopard", 3 pk, $9.99
Get it here.

Violent Lips current promotion is 20% off by using code "HW2013" at checkout. Shop them here.

Want to win $150 in makeup from 2nd Love Cosmetics?!

Click here for info.

Print store coupon here.
Moving on...
Ulta Beauty has $3.50 off a minimum $10 purchase.

Trick or treat? A treat indeed.

Shop more Halloween sales here. has some browse-worthy Halloween coupons & discount codes for places like:

Party City, Spirit Halloween, Target, Disney Store, Babies R Us, Walgreens, Kmart, Walmart, Petco, Hot Topic, Justice & Urban Outfitters.

Those shoes are hot!

Enjoy your hump day and Halloween. All at once. Can I get a hump bump, peoples?!

It's a fist bump, but only for camels. I know. I'm nerdy, Governor...
I almost forgot!

American Horror Story Coven is on tonight! Tune in to FX at 10pm. Now what do you call fist bumps of the witchy kind? Well, I have no idea. Kinda' why I was askin'...

Monday, October 21, 2013

Minty Motivational Mondays


I stand here waiting for you to wake me up this Monday with some motivation. With what, you ask?! Mint, of course.

Also let it be known that Gaga's audio for "Do What You Want" dropped today as well as Justin Bieber's "Hold Tight" audio. Currently, Justin is promoting the hashtag #MusicMonday & will be releasing a new single for 10 weeks in a row leading up to his "Believe" Tour filmed documentary. Currently we're on week 2 or 3. "Do What You Want" is eloquently titled since Gaga paired up with R. Kelly on this collaboration. We all know that R. Kelly does what he wants with teen girls and yellow colored bodily liquids. ;o) Sorry, couldn't help myself. Wait! I know. Maybe R. Kels can borrow Justin's mop bucket instead. Sorry, couldn't help myself again, y'all. If there are two guys in the universe that I can't look at the same since such captivating news broke, it would totally have to be him and Bill Clinton. No more polka dot dresses, por favor. Can I get a Beep, Beep?! Holler. 

Tarte's Pure Delights LipSurgence Set, $34
Get it here.

Ummm, yeah....

Switching topics, invigorate your lips with some peppermint oil & Vitamin C. As you look to your left, you'll notice an 8-pc. awesome limited edition holiday set from Tarte. Your lips needed to not only smell great, but look great as well... like yesterday.

Four LipSurgences are matte & the other four in the set are a little more glossy. One can practically try out the entire stinking line of LipSurgences by purchasing this set. Did we mention that they're tiny enough to tuck in your pocket?! Pick them up soon as these no-need-for-sharpening wonders will be gone probably even before Black Friday.

L'Anza Mint Revitalizer Conditioner, $12
Get it here.

Moving on...

If you've never tried L'Anza Healing Haircare's Mint Revitalizer Conditioner, whoa buddy! It's a daily conditioner that wakes me up about as much as my hazelnut coffee does. It's infused with peppermint & tea tree oil. Personally I leave it on while washing my face, body or whatever. Finally, when I do rinse it off it's like someone gave me a bottle of Herbal Essence shampoo or conditioner in an airplane bathroom. Furthermore, go ahead & cue in O Face guy from Office Space the movie.

This conditioner also contains keratin bond system 2 (KB2) to heal each strand from root to tip. It's extremely weightless & has a pH of 5.5, which is also awesome sauce. I had heard that it got discontinued, but am not 100% sure of this fact. It is still available online & at some Ulta Beauty stores for sure.

Philosophy "Peppermint Stick 3-in-1, $16.50
Read more here.
What else do I love?

Philosophy Peppermint Bath & Body stuff! Some holiday sets of theirs are dubbed "Candy Cane", but this year we're 90% certain they'll be called "Peppermint Stick".

Any who, the point is that they're all refreshing and even my kiddos love them to death. If and when this set hits the bathtub in my house, the kids are trying to take baths like three times a day. For real.

Check your fave Philosophy counter around Black Friday time. Philosophy has zero info up on their site about it yet.

Deep Clean Cream Cleanser, $4.99
Get it here.

Two more faves come to mind if you need to immerse yourself further in minty goodness.

Neutrogena's Deep Clean Cream Cleanser is highly notable right up there with Clean & Clear's Dual Action Moisturizer for the face. Both also contain salicylic acid to help refine pores and treat existing blemishes. They're both also oil-free. Sham wow!

Clean & Clear's Dual Action Moisturizer, 2 / $10
On sale now at Walgreens. Stock up!

Both are available at pretty much any drug store known to man. Homo sapiens unite!


"The tallest oak in the forest was once just a little nut that held its ground. On the odd day that it felt uninspired to grow, it totally used minty stuff in the shower."   ~J.~

Thursday, October 17, 2013

Fun Halloween Makeup Face Charts

Are you feeling a tad bit uninspired this Halloween? Well, you won't after you take one gander at these amazing face charts from 2nd Love Cosmetics! They're sooo hot right now...

Let's talk for a hot second about this matte blush palette which consists of 10 amazing to-die-for blush colors. We will be using several colors from it this weekend for the costume parties we're attending.  That bright pink is hot and the red blush is really hard to find! The pictures are nothing compared to the real life pigment it rocks. It is quite lovely. We'll also be using it on clients who have some swaggy shindigs to attend. Should we have some good reception, we shall tweet the loveliness that takes place!

Matte Blush Palette, $11.99
Get it here.

Glow Gloss, $3.99 each
Get it here.
Another really cool product 2nd Love Cosmetics makes is Glow-in-the-Dark Lip Gloss!

Go on... don't be scurrred & confused to look awesome. You'll love it. We promise. Don't even get me started on its "doesn't hurt my wallet" price point. 2nd Love also ships for free any purchases over $25. Sham wow! More awesome sauce, please...

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Zombie Makeup Obsessions

Fireman Saves Kitten

This right here just makes my heart feel super happy, Kai Lan! How this fireman even found this little miracle kitten is awesome sauce! God bless all those who risk their lives to not only save us, but also the pets that love us unconditionally. Animals rock.

Monday, October 14, 2013

Questions I Ask Myself

1- Why do you put YouTube videos on your posts?
For obvious jamming out reasons. My posts are so cool they have their own theme songs. Duh. Plus, since I haven't organized or pimped out my playlists on YouTube yet, I can simply look at my site.

2- What's in your shower that you can't live without?
Boots Botanics Microderm Scrub, $12.99
Get it here.
Boots Botanicals Microdermabrasion Polish Age Defense is gritty awesome sauce.

MAC Cosmetics used to make one. Then they discontinued it and life as I knew it was over until I found this scrub. I use it in the mornings about 2-3 times / week. You can get it at Target stores in person like me, or online as well. Use it in the mornings so your foundation will look smooth, possibly without the need for use of a primer. Why exfoliate? Dead skin harbors bacteria, which creates pimples and blemishes. Using circular motions meanwhile avoiding the upper eye area, scrub it in for about two minutes. Then, Voila! Smooth awesome sauce. For right around $12.99!

3- How do you juggle writing from home, cleaning the house, doing makeup, being a mom & an amazing wife?

Okay, fine. I put the amazing wife part in there. Obviously I wrote these questions! Bwa ha ha! (That's my witchy vampire laugh.) To answer your question, I don't. In fact, I think I suck at it. I ain't scurred or confused to admit this. I need more money, another car, an actual house to call our own, a maid, a full time laundry folder and even more money so I can build up my blogs to make my business dreams come true. I'd take over the world if I could, but I can't at this current juncture in my life. Hubs and I are so stressed out trying to make our simple ends meet with our family of four. For some reason, God hasn't given me a full time job offer lately and all I can think is that this economy stinks. Right now I'm trying to work around my hubs full time hours. Maybe I'm supposed to be doing what God wants me to, which is blogging. Who knows. All I know is I'm not going to sit still waiting for the big money job offers to roll in. Daycare is expensive & something that must be factored in when accepting a full time position. Don't even get me started on car payments, gas & lunch expenses. Sometimes you have to make your own dreams a reality. So, I'm up in here trying to show the world that: Yes, you can create your own job as well as eventually make money at it. Makeup's my love and part-time jobberson. If I can help women become more confident in themselves as well as in their beauty routines on a mass scale, then I will be happy doing so. Now... poo on the haters, Mister Ed. Fling some maneur at them with your horse hooves. Finally, bayonet them. Like Pinky and the Brain, eventually I will show the world as well as teach them how I became successful with just a will and a way, with zero dollars in my pocket. Cue in the people who want to gift me a video camera. I'm fairly comfortable enough blogging now & YouTube is my next pet project. Sham wow! More awesome sauce, please...

4- What's your secret?
Watching and reading The Secret over and over again. Optimists unite. The world sucks enough with negative energy, demotivating us at every corner we turn. I'm on the good vibe road.

5- Does anyone in your life understand what you do on the daily?
Blog Print Art 11x14, $21
Get it here.
I think not. Most probably think that my blogging adventures are a hobby instead of a lucrative job choice in the future. However, you've got to put the time in. It's an investment. You can't run a mile without taking the first step, yo. The world needs to understand the power of a blogger from a marketing & advertising perspective. Businesses dream of being in front of your peoples. In this economy, businesses had to cut waaayyyy back on their marketing expenses. What bloggers provide is a warm lead list, so to speak, of which these businesses didn't have to market to in the first place. Bloggers not only promote businesses, but also create digital content. Trust me when I tell you that 90% of businesses don't even know how to market themselves. I used to be in B2B. Furthermore, if you see them opening up full time positions in this economy for their own in-house associate, holler at this sister right hurrr! Any who, I am basically becoming my own advertising power house & in the future you'll see me monetizing my blog, complete with ad space. And whistles. And bayonets.

There are waaayyyy worse things I could be doing with my time...

Battle of the Strands Final Battle 2013

We are hours away from the most extreme beauty battle of 2013! Battle of the Strands is heating up. The teams arrived in Las Vegas October 9th. They've been going through strenuous elimination rounds to make it to the final battle which is being livestreamed through the Internet TONIGHT!

From our team to all the ones competing in Vegas, we wish you all the best of luck! It was a total honor even being associated with such talent and was a great experience that we'd do again, hundreds of times over.

Photo: Paul Wedlake

What's even crazier is that our work will more than likely show up on tonight's viewing under Team Fabulous Hair. Way to go, us! Even though we're a little on-location operation, it doesn't negate from the fact that we have talent just as large as salon power houses.

Furthermore, we are more than happy to come to your fashion show, photo shoot or wedding! Busy appointment books make our hearts feel super happy, just stated KaiLan. Ni, hao!

Hopefully I didn't look ridiculous on camera! Lolz. We shall find out if the camera really does add ten pounds, which I'm sure it does! Praise the Lord I highlighted and contoured a little bit. Furthermore, it never fails that whenever I have something really important to do, one of my eyes waters enough to not let my Duo eyelash adhesive stick in one corner! Aargh. It better not happen when Nat Geo Wild is taping for Big Cat Week at Ulta. Yes, I shall be teaching people how to do cat eyes with a limited edition Big Cat makeup set from Pur Minerals in November. Stay tuned for that project. If you'll be in my area Nov. 1st or 2nd, holler at a sister and I'll be more than happy to pencil you in for a free makeover  ;o)  xoxoxo

Just in time for Halloween!
$3.99 & up per extension
Get Glowby's here.

So, without further adieu...
Here are some of the products we used for the BOTS Orlando qualifier!

First, let's give mad shout outs to Glowby's. These light up wonders are cuttable, fiber-optic hair extensions. They come in an array of colors and should be cut at a 45 degree angle to maintain brightness. Let's also not forget the kiddos here and remember to get them light up handle beams which can be put on bikes and scooters. You can also put them on skateboards. Rock on, dudes. My kids love them!

MAC's Fluidline, $16
In "Waveline"
Get it here.

Shout outs to MAC Cosmetics, Make Up For Ever, Kenra & Tarpon Springs authentic sponges. Opa!

Pro Longwear Lipcreme, $18
In "Good To Go"
Get it here.

Archie's Girls Pearlglide Liner
In "Petrol Blue", $16.50
Get it here.

Lastly, thank you again for all your votes and kind words. We couldn't of even made it as far as we did without your digital love and support.

Any who, we hope you'll tune in. Nutella on a spoon is seriously calling my name not to mention the L'Anza Mint Revitalizer Conditioner which resides in my shower.

Oh, yeah... in case you missed it, I chopped me some Michelle Obama high fashion bangs for the BOTS competition final video submission. However, their current status is growing out and annoying. Michelle Obama and I totes agree on this factoid. We think we shall grow them out as well.  ;o)

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Zombie Makeup Love

Thor Thursday, Opa Parent Style

FabKids New Members, $20 off
FabKids, 3 pc- $39.95


FabKids, 3pc- $39.95
Join the club here.

Now click here for more funny parents singing & guess what?! It's a playlist ;o) "I'm a Daddy" on the playlist is really cute, too. And he knows it.

Hey. We're just trying to make you at work probably more productive than resolution talks regarding the government shutdown. Debt ceiling? Schmebt schmeiling. What up, babes? Boss, look at me now, not doing a thing, watching videos... and gettin' yo' payyypurrrr. Or dear hubby, look at me now, not folding your clothes, watching videos... and gettin' yo' payyypurrr.

Click here for a really cute mommy parody to "When you say nothing at all"...


Furthermore, outfit your kids with FabKids. All the collections are mix and match. So, even if you're a dad who can't manage to match your kids correctly, just invest in some of these total time savers. Both your wife and kids will thank you for it. Trust me. You can find other ways to embarrass your kids. Like walking them to class. Then kissing them in front of their friends. Or uploading your raps to YouTube.

Happy #ThorThursday

PS- MikeWillMadeIt actually and factually did not make this post.            

Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Happy Hump Day

Happy Hump Day, peoples! Because camels are sooo like last week's thang, here is the cutest dog who really looks like he's enjoying his day. Man, I wonder if I could get away with doing that all day long!
It looks ahhh-mazing! 

Over in my part of the world, it's really finally starting to feel like Halloween & Holiday time. I just might have to wear a sweatshirt today when I'm out exercising with the baby. Finally! Oh, who am I kidding?! Surely it will get hot again over the weekend. Aargh.

"Phenom" Glam Glitter, $11.25
Get SALTY Cosmetics here.

Any who...
Let me tell you what I'm groovin' on lately. These items have for real been my life or death situations. I need them to survive!

Let's talk about this "Phenom" Glam Glitter, y'all. It almost looks sheer when applied dry. We also recommend a firm bristled brush so it doesn't create eyeshadow falloff.

However, when you wet it to create a cream, use an eyeshadow sealant or Too Faced's Glitter Glue, this is what happens:

Pigs fly, the government reopens, unicorns become family pets & Jimmy Choo conference calls you at your house with Kimora Lee Simmons to invite you to critique & wear all the latest upcoming styles (for free).

Too Faced's Glitter Glue, $20
Get it here.

This "Phenom" color wet reminds me of MAC's Amber Lights eyeshadow color. If you can't get into some sparkly, ambery, bronzy deliciousness this fall, then I simply don't know what's wrong with you. Furthermore, colors like these work with all eye colors.

For fab fall savings, use code SPOOKY13 at checkout for 25% off SALTY Cosmetics.

Minks in Links Bracelet, $14.95
Get it from JustFab here.
Now, pair your glammed up eyeballs with this Minx in Links bracelet by JustFab. Then, pair it with these Domenicas below. You are now officially hot in goldness. There's a certain gleam in your eye when you know you look this good. Arguably, I know why your friends are envious of your fabulousness...
"Domenica" Booties, $39.95
Get it here.

Target Stores, $4.99

Pumpkin Spice Glade Plug-Ins are all over my house. 

You better go get you some now before I get the chance to stock pile all the limited edition deliciousness. Then you can come over and pry them out of my dead, lifeless fingers because I am obsessively addicted. Beware of my spork bayonets- just stated Mister Ed.

Target Stores, $2.99
Toasted Marshmallow is also my jam du jour & I'm sure I'd love Salted Caramel as well. I just haven't smelled or bought it yet.

Monday, October 7, 2013

Sunn Official

I fell in love with Sunn quite a while ago! 
Please, Dear Record or Music Executive... sign her already! 
She is the cutest.

Thursday, October 3, 2013

More cute wrecking balls

Jeff Barrett posted this a couple days ago & I thought it was super cute. You saw the kitten wrecking ball below, right?! From Vine? Any who, here is what Mashable thinks of this pretty puppy parody. We agree. We also love the video that plays after the puppy parody. The inner makings of what went into it is a must see. For riz-eals, yo!

Wednesday, October 2, 2013

Controversial Videos of the Week

So, why are these controversial video choices of the week, yo? First off, let's talk for a small second about the twerk a werk nation. Strippers, twerking and B words = controversial to the max. Meanwhile, they leave little for the imagination. Don't even get mad at me. I didn't make these videos. I'm simply reporting on the deliciousness. Don't get me wrong because I love Rihanna and Britney, hence why I felt the need to post them. All I will say is that molested foam fingers and latex bikinis are hard to compete against. Oh, dear college football twerker... you're a player. And I'm the coach.

Play on.

The #BindersFullOfMen Movement

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