Monday, September 30, 2013

The Makeup Show Orlando & Motivational Mondays

The Makeup Show
So, recapping the Makeup Show Orlando in my brain is what I'm doing today.

I got to meet sooo many unbelievably awesome artists, new friends & cool companies I'll be blogging and writing for in the upcoming months. There is seriously so much to write & they all deserve to be their own posts. For sheer coolness & search engine optimization reasons. However, since I've been digging my "Motivational Mondays" schtick, I decided to review my last Monday post.

Something completely stuck out in my head when I got to thinking about my blogging business regarding the Optimist's Creed from the Secret:

"To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true. To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best."



Dearest people in life with aspirations,
Please incorporate that particular quote above into your business and life plan. As a blogger, I gave my business card to everyone at the show as these peeps are my target market and some of the best in the business were there. Now, if I had taken the outlook from the beginning that I wasn't good enough to associate myself with them, they wouldn't be on airplanes right now with my business cards in their pockets, wallets or purses. Putting yourself out there or selling yourself or product is highly stressful and at times very discouraging. But, let's ponder some Internet dating loveliness, without the catfishing, just for a small second. Why do people on match.com get statistically more dates? They put themselves out there. Are you picking up what I'm putting down? Sure, some of the people and businesses hadn't read my blog or knew who I was. But did I actually get offended? I think not. Now, were there some that were really receptive? But of course. It's the J-ness we're talking about here. Mmmkay?! (Ha.Ha. I'm super cool in my own head.) Then, there were some who I know won't contact me back for a couple of years but by no means am I closing up blogging shop. Like a person in true B2B sales, sometimes you have to drip on people. Either by social media, email marketing or good old face to face. Furthermore, in sales you need to show people your -ness.

Find Your Ness T-Shirt, $33.95
Get it here.

So, what's my business plan? To work with people that want to work with me. Short of stating the obvious, I shall now say "Duh." What's the rest of my business plan you ask? To show people the J-ness. (Among other things. Obviously.)


Friends, go out into the world today & I challenge you to show people your 
-ness. Rock on.

Friday, September 27, 2013

Galifianakis spanks Justin Bieber on Video

#TGIF
Happy Friday, y'all. Now which of you ladies, moms or dads have wanted to spank Bieber lately? His fan girl beliebers would like to spank him probably in a more 50 shades of grey type of way, but that's neither here nor there. Well, below Zach Galifianakis calls all us Beliebers "Beaners". This small hint leads me to believe Justin's going to release a new album in espanol. The first single will feature shouts outs to Netflix and Juicy J of course will lay down the fire lyrics regarding lollipops. Justin of course will sing the chorus of "Hola, Puerto Rico!" He will then give some rap shout outs to Mexico while eating ten tamales drizzy Drake drizzled with hot sauce in an El Camino... Finally, Justin will finish the song by taking pics of your girl, even though she's not a model & then make her call him Papi... or Rick James...

Check out the music video "Lolly" here. What do you think? Other than the fact that Justin just needs to go ahead and throw out all the shirts in his closet? He does, indeed, look good shirtless. Personally, I think all the chicks and guys look way too young to be dancing or talking about lollipops in such a way. Good were the days when lollipops were simply sugar on a stick. Throwbacks to the 1980's, friends!





Finally, Kanye & Jimmy Kimmel are feuding. Click here  & here to hear all about it. Then to make you shed a slight tear for something a little more worthwhile, click here to learn more about what good Justin Bieber is doing in the world. He's been bringing awareness to a great cause. We've gotta' admit... he's a good guy. If you were that rich and famous at his tender teen age, wouldn't you be doing some nonsense? Praise the Lord social media wasn't around when I was a teenager. For real. Communication, both good and bad, moves at the speed of light these days. And haters are going to hate. Why? It's what they do. Duh.

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Hear me roar


I know you saw it! Katy Perry makes a bayonet of fury with the heel of her shoe! Mister Ed totes loves it. Then, to top it all off, she names the tiger Kitty Purry. This video is totally awesome. Let's not even get into the fact that I think I'm pretty good at shower singing the chorus. My neighbors can hear me ro-oh- oh- oh- ar...

Any who, let's talk Halloween.


All the tiger-ness inspires the J-ness. There I was a couple of Friday nights ago and someone came in looking for makeup to do a tiger look for Halloween. Coincidence? I think not, y'all. The lovely ladies showed me this here picture & we went to town recreating it. The final result was nothing short of ahhh-mazing!

Radiant Makeup
No, I can't say I did the steps exactly like what Radiant Beauty depicts here. I'm an artist and we all differ on steps and techniques. I can't even say I used the same colors or products.

But, what I will say is this: I'm in love with how pretty this tiger look still makes you look. It's got the right amount of highlighting and contouring, meanwhile still looking like a beautifully recognizable female human. Don't get me wrong. Becoming a full-on tiger is really cool, too. Let's just say that this look is more wearable and sexier than others.

Happy Early Halloween, y'all!

Monday, September 23, 2013

Motivational Mondays

Hey, now. Don't be confusing Motivational Mondays with Man Candy Mondays...


For the out of touch, this wonderful hashtag abbreviated #MCM is surely something both feminists and their  binders full of men  approve of.


Oh, relax you female lovers... there is #WCW, which stands for Woman Candy Wednesdays as well. The binders full of women movement has to be the leading force behind this one, right? One ponders.


Any who, welcome to another edition of Motivational Mondays. Instead of me boring the life force out of your intellectual mind saber, let's watch some videos and post some pics. Enjoy!


Live Life Happy



The Secret's Visualization Tools

Internet Wrecking Balls

Dude, God Bless the Internet...
Male humans are making Miley Cyrus wrecking ball parody videos & we find them wildly entertaining! You still might not be able to put the toilet seat down, but you're making us laugh so it's all good. Now when you make me laugh so hard & have to run to the toilet to wee, I can fall in. Awesome sauce.

There's just something hilariously awkward about
men swinging on wrecking balls.
Take a gander, friends...









King the Kid is ahh-mazing at singing! Am I right or am I right?!

Enjoy your day.

Friday, September 20, 2013

Confessions of a makeup artist


Hey! Check out Kryolan's makeup artist Jordan Plath
do zombie makeup as well!

1- So, I watched World War Z for the first time last night. After it ended, I had to watch comedy for 30 minutes to even be able to sleep. Cheetah speed human undeads scare me to death. Especially when you're like Brad Pitt in the beginning of the movie with your kids in tow. Today I'm still recovering & preparing for the zombie apocalypse. Eat some delicious foods in case you do die: Check. Learn some special effects so you can blend in if you are still human: Check. Get so sick or diseased that you're not healthy enough of a host for the zombies to infect you: Uncheck. What's a girl to do? Well, I'm starting off by drinking a whole ton of caffeinated coffee with copious amounts of white sugar. To top that off, I bought a really large bag of M&M's to nosh on. Next, I shall dress up like a giant chicken & go into the swampy woods around here. Maybe the nasty alligators can give me some bacteria or I'll find some birds who haven't gotten eaten by these amazingly awful alligators yet. Hopefully they can give me some bird flu. Hook a sister up, but don't do a fly by and poop on my head. Thanks, Brad Pitt, for the tips. I always knew you'd be the one to save Amurrica anyway.


2- The thoughts in my head have me really thinking about making and stock piling some bayonets around here. They've been useful since like waaaay before 1917 and the military does in fact still use them!


3- I really need a pair of black comfortable shoes. Just sayin'.

4- It's time for a "change the scenery at your desk" day. Just imagine the awesome nonsense that I could come up with. I think I'm going to do it. There's no time like today. However, the procrastinator in me says that there's no time like tomorrow. Then, tomorrow I'll have the excuse that I'm working a double. Excuses are endless...

5- TGIF, friends!




Wednesday, September 18, 2013

David Klasfeld at The Makeup Show


David Klasfeld keynotes at The Makeup Show Orlando!

As the Creator and Founder of 
Obsessive Compulsive Cosmetics,

David has managed to make his ground breaking line a must have for makeup artists, vegans & enthusiasts everywhere. In this Makeup Show Orlando presentation, David will share the story of how he started OCC from the ground up, with only two lip balms: Tarred and Feathered.



At The Makeup Show,

David will tear it up in his keynote speech by offering key insight into the process of starting a makeup line. Listen in on and take notes while David details how to develop and create products that quickly become cult favorites. Set trends, y'all! Make those dollar, dollar bills like a makeup guru-gangster. Holler.


Building a Brand with David Klasfeld
Saturday, September 28, 2013
11:30 am to 1:00 pm
* The Makeup Show Orlando *

Have you seen the revamped website?!
Somewhere Paris Hilton is screaming, "That's Hot!"
Shop OCC here...


If you've ever dreamed of or fantasized about owning your own makeup brand, 

this is the real deal Holyfield of presentations that you simply cannot miss!







See you at The Makeup Show!
You know I'll be there, given I'm obsessive & compulsive about makeup...

among other things...

Monday, September 16, 2013

The Work Twerk

Yup. Yup. 
Apparently it's work day around these parts!
It's not typical for this bloggy bloggerson to post the cussy words, but there's just no edited version of this newly released Britney Spears song yet. Below is the audio du jour.





Iggy Azalea is like the white girl version of Nicki Minaj. For riz-eals, yo.
Now... if I could just twerk my bum like her, I firmly believe 90% of my problems in life could be solved.

Then I'd say, "Quick! Break out your video camera. Someone pass me a smelly animal mascot costume & let's upload this dancing loveliness to the YouTubey."

Did you know Britney Spears & Miley Cyrus Latex Pants are collaborating on Miley's new album "Bangerz"?! I am, indeed, excited about this!

Mind = Blown

Even me and my Ulta Beauty friends had full on discussions about twerking tutorials. Look me in my eyes. I'm not lying about this. Dedicated to you all, and you know who you are, I posted the below "How To" in your honor. Love you all! xoxoxo





Thursday, September 12, 2013

Wake me up to milkshakes


Feeling my way through the darkness
Guided by a beatin' heart
I can't tell where the journey will end...
But I know where to start.

     They tell me I'm too young to understand
     They say I'm caught up in a dream
     Well life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes
     Well that's fine by me.

So wake me up when it's all over
When I'm wiser and I'm older
All this time I was finding my self, and 
I didn't know I was lost.

     I tried carrying the weight of the world
     But I only have two hands
     Hope I get the chance to travel the world
     But I don't have any plans.

Wish that I could stay forever this young
Not afraid to close my eyes
Life's a game made for everyone
And love is the prize.

     So wake me up when it's all over
     When I'm wiser and I'm older
     All this time I was finding my self, and 
     I didn't know I was lost.

allrecipes.com

Today is National Chocolate Milkshake Day, y'all!


Go crazy drowning yourself in these recipes here and here!








Tell me... will they make me wiser and older?
Chocolate Milfshake Button, $4
Get it here.
Wake me up when your recipe madness is all over & serve me one.
From a straw, please. Gotta' have the straw...

nowaygirl.com

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

A Day of Reflection


This day is sad in so many ways and on so many levels it's not even funny. Maybe these pictures and quotes can explain exactly how I'm feeling.










Today shall be a day of reflection. A day of prayers. A day thanking God I'm still alive. A day I thank America for being courageous. A day I thank myself for trying. A day that I am still saddened by the inhumanity taking place in our vast world. A day I shall always remember. A day that is owed to those who have lost their life for me to type on this computer du jour.





America didn't die after great tragedy. If anything, it motivated us as a country to become better & try again. Move on. Get better. Up our game. Show exactly what we're made of in times of despair.






For it's America's values and ideals that shall always be ingrained in my heart, regardless of whatever circumstances arise. Let's all learn from these and keep on keepin' on....

 

Luv,
~J.~

Friday, September 6, 2013

How To Go Viral



What does the fox say?
He says, "I'm going viral, baby!"


How will you speak to that ho-ho-ho-horse?!
In a unicorn mask. Duh.

People may or may not be interested in how things go viral on social media. Allow Mister Ed sans his bayonet to break it down twerk style for you.


  • #YoureADork. Observe trends and hashtags. Then, do something with them as to incorporate them into your marketing mix. If you've got nothing to say, give your input by commenting to a hashtag with including a hashtag in your tweet or Google+ post or whatever. Be a good sport and play along. Furthermore, one can also start pages and accounts based on these hashtags, but beware. Fear my bayonet the next time presidential debates come along. Even more so, don't just start something and then do nothing with it. Persistence is key and honest to God I lose followers erryday I don't tweet or post.

    Star Wars Chop Sticks, $12.99
    Eat sushi, defend the galaxy!
    Get them here.

  • In order to be shared, you yourself have to share. Play nice! People still enjoy personalization, even if it's from your computer. Retweet, share, comment or whatever. Doing this will also help you gain followers. Should a person decide to share your content, you are now being exposed to their followers, who of which you didn't have to market to before this sharey awesomeness happened.

  • "Stay interesting, my friends" -just stated the General from Dos Equis. This doesn't mean you need to negate from what you stand for as a business. One does not have to start being all vulgar and stuff just to go viral. Just understand most would rather be drinking a Dos Equis than read something so boring that it sucks the life force out of their intellectual mind saber.

  • You stand one heck of a chance to go viral if you observe when exactly the best times to post on various social media platforms are. It's sort of a new science & depending on who you talk to or what you read the answers differ. I did, however, read this awesomely generalized article here that sheds some light on a possible answer. It's also a fairly easy read. Me likey graphs, charts & pictures.

Donna Karan Cashmere Mist Parfum, $54
Get it here.

  • Last night at work, I slapped on some amazing Donna Karan Cashmere Mist and was suddenly in heaven. Rocking good fall scents and doing makeovers puts me totally in my element. I could seriously talk beauty products until the cows come home or pigs fly. Don't get me started! Any who, that's neither here nor there. The point is that once I put on this scent, I was reminded of another reference to show you all. Look below and then read the deliciousness where DKNY PR Girl explains the evolution of DKNY's social media Twitter account.


  • Virality is ninja mastered by someone with basic hyperlinking, photo editing and/or video making skills. Hyperlinking basically means your ability to copy and paste a correct link. A few programs or websites I like for photo editing are Picasa 3.9MemeGenerator. Both are free, peeps. The most recent video making & editing program I'm using is by Movavi. It will, however, put you back about say $60 bucks. Windows Movie Maker is also always a classic which comes on most computers. Better yet, heed this advice. Walk into an Office Depot or Best Buy and buy a physical program with a disc and user's manual. If you opt to purchase something online for download, there is really no one to contact that will get back to you in a moment's time. Let alone the fact that their customer service may be outsourced to other countries. I'm just keeping it real, peeps. You know this, man!

Should you find this blog post entertaining...

entertain me by voting for my team in this epic reality TV beauty battle we're in called Battle of the Strands

Click on the green check mark here 
to cast your vote, please. 

Heck, go crazy! From there you'll find links to "like on YouTube" & "like on Facebook" as well. They all count & are much appreciated. Online voting wraps up in about 3 days & Mister Ed is fighting in a war even more hard core than it was in 1916. If you vote, tweet at me telling me you did & I'll give you mad social media love. After all, that's how this whole social media thing works. Scratch Mister Ed's back & indeed he will share his back scratcher. Unfortunately for him, it just so happens to be a bayonet. Oh, well...


XOXOXO,
~J.~ 

PS- Is it just me or does the Fox video kind of sound like The Jonas Brothers "First Time" video? I'm not actually comparing them to foxes or horses, but they're both equally catchy! Lol.

Monday, September 2, 2013

Happy Labor Day



Happy Labor Day, friends!

We might not ever be Royals, but I've always considered myself soooo young money anyway. Woot! Woot!

There is nothing wrong with working hard for something in life. Usually speaking, the outcome is always sweeter when you finally reach success by way of blood, sweat & tears.

Mike Rowe brought up some interesting points on TV the other day where we have become a generation of "Work smart, not hard." He believes we need to start promoting "Work smart AND hard."

Watch the deliciousness I call his Huckabee interview below...



Instead of Dude, where's my car...
I'M SCREAMING Dude, where's my full time job?! Cheese and rice.

PS- Please vote for your favorite Mister Ed in this epic reality TV beauty battle I'm in called Battle of the Strands by clicking on the green check mark here
Horses and Bayonets for life, peeps...
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